The Beautiful Mess that is My Life

Life Doesn't Have to be Perfect to be Wonderful

In a perfect world, I would have an inspiring blog that appeared regularly on my well-designed March Forth website. In that same perfect world, I would have a line of both paper and electronic greeting cards, so people could send hope-filled messages to one another to celebrate this day. And, in my perfect little world, March 4^th would be a national holiday.

But we don’t live in a perfect world, and I don’t have a perfect life, so you won’t be seeing any of those things any time soon. That doesn’t matter because I live in a wonderfully imperfect world. I live in a world that is sometimes bumpy, sometimes boring, and sometimes breath-taking. And that makes it simply fabulous.

I was reminded of this recently when a friend asked me to locate some photos of a rock-climbing retreat that we had attended together. This would have been a fairly normal request, except for the fact that the event was 19 years ago, and took place before we had digital cameras. To make matters worse, I had dumped all of my photos into boxes and squirreled them away in a remote corner of a closet (to be later organized in that perfect world.)

To help out my friend, I dutifully dragged out all the boxes of my photos, and dug through them, one handful at a time. It felt like the last 40 years of my life flashed before me in slow motion. Several years of memories came flooding back. None of it looked perfect, but all of it looked wonderful.

And so now we celebrate another March Forth. How ever we choose to commemorate the day, I hope we all pause to reflect on how wonderful our lives truly are—even with the ups and downs. I hope we all go fearlessly forward and remember that “life doesn’t have to be perfect to be wonderful.”

As a case in point, the picture of the rock-climbing trip (above) shows me as a triumphant participant. But if you look closely you may notice that I have many scraped and bruised. Mine was a clumsy and terrifying ascent. It was far from perfect, but certainly was wonderful.

Happy March Forth!

We Cannot Not March Forth

If we stop to think about, we realize that we cannot not march forth. We are all on a trajectory whether we acknowledge it or not. Time is constantly moving forward. Even if we are standing completely still, we will find ourselves in a new place because we will be in a different place in time. A boulder in the middle of a flowing river is changed whether it wants to be or not.

I do not mean to advocate the life of a boulder (or a couch-potato). On the contrary, I believe it is in the spirit of March 4^th to do something. The day invites us to be intentional, declarative, deliberate. To march forth is not to idle, dilly-dally, or meander. March 4^th beckons us to set a direction—and pursue it!

Both the boulder and the river are on a journey. It just seems to me that the river is choosing its path more intentionally than the boulder. One might argue that the river has no say in the direction it must flow—but anyone who lives near a river will tell you that the direction may be set—but the path can vary greatly.

What I like about the river is that changes with time---not because of time. Life is happening to the boulder, but the river is actively participating in life. This inspires me to understand the “flow of life” to be a cooperative effort.

Time is marching on. If we are marching forth in time anyway, why not have a say in the way we wish to go? Why not maximize this wonderful gift of life and pay attention to the movement that lies deep within our hearts? Any intentional movement on our part will most certainly bring us that much closer to our true selves. Abraham Lincoln said it well,

“The best way to predict your future is to create it.”

I hope I do not live this beautiful life like a boulder. I would much rather move to the promptings of my heart, and happily march forth. Besides, I believe the river is having a lot more fun!

Lent and the Chocolate Puffs Lesson

In my previous life as an outdoor adventurer, many lessons were learned as I trudged through the harsh environment of what can only be described as extreme back-packing. It is no secret, for example, that when you hike for several days in, say, the Grand Canyon, every ounce you carry matters. This is simply because every ounce you carry is felt in every step you take.

So on just such an adventure, I packed a light-weight sunscreen stick to replace any bottles or tubes. I worked out a plan to share cooking utensils to help lighten the load. I even chose to forego a tent—just too much weight—and opted to sleep under the stars each night.

But when it came to food, I made some poorer choices. I had easily snacked on protein bars back home in the flat lands.  I soon learned that in the desert---these same treats were about as palatable as hockey pucks! They were not only heavy in my pack—they sat heavy on my stomach.

As I tried to choke down these compact little bricks, I found myself increasingly mooching off a fellow hiker. She had wisely packed a mixture of peanut-butter and chocolate puffs that was so much easier to consume. Her snack was much less complicated than my dense protein bars. And yet, my body was fueled just the same. I thought to myself—aha! Sometimes simpler is better; sometimes lighter is preferred.

During this season of Lent, I’ve been thinking quite a bit about the idea that “sometimes less is better.” Little by little, I have been decreasing the number of distractions in my life that slow me down. Some of those distractions are the radio and TV---some of them are foods that make me feel sluggish. As my days become quieter, and my meals become cleaner—I find that my senses are becoming sharper and my steps are become lighter.

Recently, I came upon the following quote:

“Great design is eliminating all unnecessary details.” – Minh D. Tran

I pondered the notion that as God designed us to be great and wonderful, perhaps we just need to strip away some of the unnecessary details---the stories and lies we choose to believe about ourselves—that only serve to weigh us down.

Sometimes it is best to just go with the basics—the simple truth of who we are—or the simplicity of chocolate puffs and peanut butter that can power us onward as we continue to march forth.

Let's Begin Again

Forget January 1^st---I believe that March 4^th is a much better day to begin the year. This isn’t just because it happens to be my favorite day of the year. It isn’t because I get such a kick out of hearing from old friends and feeling their well wishes. And it isn’t a result of the fact that I have been celebrating it for such a long time. I can think of several compelling reasons to promote March 4^th as our new New Year’s Day! Consider this:

First of all, March 4^th comes in early spring when the earth itself is just waking up. I am blessed to live in a part of the country where I can experience all four seasons. While Autumn is still my all-time favorite, Spring runs a very close second. Slowly but surely the monochromatic landscape gives way to pink and white and lavender buds. Tender soft green shoots hold both promise and fragility in beautiful tension. Everything is fresh and alive. No matter how cold or dark or just plain dull the winter months have been, spring turns the page to hopefulness.

And no matter the sorrows or disappointments of the past, spring makes the heart new. In fact, the colder the winter, the happier the spring.

O sad, cold winter

Harsh to prove the warmth to come

Spring makes the heart new

Secondly, March 4^th comes during the Christian Lenten season. While the earth is waking up, my spirit wakes up as I journey through this holy time. There is something about fasting that wakes up my senses. Increased prayer opportunities open my heart. And giving to the poor expands my heart even further. Clean the slate; simplify; chip away at some of those little habits that clutter up who I am really meant to be. Lent can do all that and more. What better way to march forth into a new year?

Finally, March 4^th just sounds more inspiring. I know what it means to march forth! It has a starting point that immediately draws me to the next step. (How does one January 1^st??) March 4^th is both challenging and encouraging at the same time. Take a chance—move forward—be a little bold.

It, like spring, holds my promise and my vulnerability in beautiful tension. Happy New Year, all you who celebrate March 4th!

Marching Forth Even When You Don't Think You Can

Sometimes God’s nudges come like a warm, gentle breeze that caress your cheek and whisper a suggestion to you. Other times, God’s promptings seem like gale-force winds that you try to knock you off your feet. There are just too many signs to be ignored.

Lately, I have felt the inescapable swirling of God’s messages. But I am a stubborn old rock who will not be easily moved. These messages—like the wind—find their way into my thoughts through every little crack and crevice. I’ll be watching TV and a commercial will announce “Change is your destiny!” I’ll be listening to the radio and on will come a book review for The Complacent Class that speaks of our society’s inability to embrace change. Even the little plaque in my bathroom challenges with “What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?” (I know, I know. I put it there for inspiration. Now it only serves to taunt me.)

Here on the eve of March 4^th---which is “the only day that tells you to do something”, I find myself struggling to do the one I need to do to effectively march forth, namely, embrace change.

I know that life is still ridiculously awesome, and I am thankful every day for this amazing gift. I also know that I am human, and as such, I tend to resist change. I suppose this has something to do with my need to be in control of everything within my power. (Yeah, I am working on that problem.) It may also have to do with a fear of the unknown—which really links back to the whole control issue.

For me, marching forth means to have a willingness to bravely move forward into a future that is not fully known. Moving forward involves change---and change is good. After all, change is growth--change is progress--and as the old saying goes it is the only thing that is permanent. I want to make peace with change---but I know I cannot do it on my own. All I can do is laugh and delight in the knowledge that God’s love is so overwhelming that these not-so-subtle messages about embracing change continue to come my way. What a happy mess to be in! Eventually, these loving gale-force winds will dislodge me and carry me along the path that lies before me.

Am I brave? Not at all. Will I march forth anyway? Absolutely! I don’t know what kind of changes are in store for me, but I am reassured that God is with me. After all, if God keeps dropping these big ole hints—then something good must be around the corner!

As much as I’d like to speak brightly and boldly about the importance of marching forth, I’d rather be honest and acknowledge that sometimes we can march forth with no small measure of fear and uncertainty…and that’s OK, too!  

Carving a Life

Every now and then, a phrase will grab me and throw me into a whirlwind of thoughts. What does that phrase really mean? And what does it mean for me? Waiting on a flight recently, I overheard a TV interview that I could not see from where I was seated. The phrase in the interview that leaped out at me was “I have chosen to carve out my own path.”

At first the thought of this phrase exhilarated me. How exciting to be able to choose one’s own destiny. How freeing to not be limited by what other people tell you to do. How thrilling to be able to design a path in life that has never been taken before.

It sounds nearly irresistible, but it does not come without its challenges. Carving a path is nothing like charting a course. The airlines charted a course to get me to Pittsburgh and back. The GPS on my phone charted a course to a local restaurant.  I even consulted a good old-fashioned paper map and landmarks to navigate downtown Pittsburgh.

When I chart a course, I merely connect a set of pre-determined paths together. When I carve a path, I am embarking on something entirely new—uncharted territory, as it were. And carving a path is much harder than following a course.

When I used to hike in the Grand Canyon, the unmarked paths required a great deal of effort. I needed to be very aware of my surroundings, and constantly focused on the path for each step I took to avoid twisting my ankle on rugged terrain. I also needed to search for cairns to be sure that I was following the right path. When I would come upon a clearly defined, smooth and level path, I called it a “highway” and was immediately able to increase my speed (especially helpful if I was losing daylight), or just cruise along almost as if I was on a conveyor belt.

So as enchanting as carving a path for my life sounds, I realize that it requires a lot of hard work. But if I think of my life—this precious, precious gift—as a pre-programmed setting on a GPS that anyone can access, or even as a safe and sure smooth path that requires little effort on my part, I am saddened. Such a life seems so boring, predictable and uninspiring.

Looking at carving a path may seem like too much effort. (I picture bushwhackers hacking out a trail in the jungle.) But if I consider carving a path like carving a statue, then I find hope. It has been said of great artists that to create a beautiful statue, they merely remove the excess material to reveal the beauty that was hidden within. So, I will march forth in a unique way in the hopes of revealing the singular life that has been gifted to me. I hope you will, too!

Clear Your Mind and Dance

Today simplicity and happiness are so trendy. Everywhere you look you hear about ways to simplify your life and ways to be happier. You may even hear that you can’t find one without the other. 

Could it be that as a society we have finally turned the corner on our consumer-driven ways and have embraced a “less is more” philosophy? Perhaps for some. But the emphasis on simplicity may be just another ploy to sell the latest, greatest product designed to make our lives easier. And we find ourselves bewildered that it takes more and more to achieve the “less is more” goal. Divesting ourselves of material goods is harder than it seems.

But let’s say we do turn the corner and choose a less product-dependent path. We may discover that we have just moved from accumulating goods to accumulating information. We soon realize we are on yet another cluttered path—strewn with too much information and entertainment. Just when we thought our load was lighter, we wonder at the exhaustion we experience by consuming huge amounts of news, entertainment and social media. I have often thought that Facebook reminded me of the East Australian Current as depicted in the movie Finding Nemo.  

“Crush: Okay. Squirt here will now give you a rundown of proper exiting technique!

Squirt: Good afternoon! We're gonna have a great jump today. Okay, first crank a hard cutback as you hit the wall! There's a screaming bottom curve, so watch out! Remember: rip it, roll it, and punch it.”

It is initially fast and fun, but once you get sucked into it, it is very difficult to disengage. And that is just one of noises that crowds into our minds. Is it any wonder there is an increase in alcohol consumption and the use of sleep aids these days? We can’t relax and slow down our information-saturated brains. Even if we make the argument that we are switching from collecting things to collecting experiences, we may still fall victim to “doing” more than “being”, and happiness will continue to elude us.

So where else can we turn to experience simplicity and happiness? There is another path we can choose and it is one that I am just beginning to traverse. In addition to reducing material goods and limiting information and entertainment consumption, I am also working on clearing my mind through meditation. I am the first to admit that my mind is still quite cluttered, but each time that I accept and release my whirling thoughts, I open some room.

And in that space between thoughts is the beautiful silence where Love lives and speaks to me. And that is where true happiness may be found.

I visualize a bigger expanse in my mind—open and clear and inviting. I am reminded of an old expression for a generous space---“You could have a dance in here!” How delightful! I am clearing the way for the dance of my imagination and marching forth down the happiness road.